AFL Round 17 Review – The Vice Presidential Edition

It felt like a long weekend of footy this weekend. We started on Thursday night, again, when 42,000 plus showed up to watch the Swans bottle it against #freekickhawthorn at the SCG. Big Horse Longmire cleverly alluded to his sides “lack of discipline” when he raised the free kick differential in the post match press conference – pointing out a 13 to 3 difference at three quarter time. TV umpires around the country once again took great delight in pointing out the number of goals received from free kicks and 50 metre penalties to the Poos and Wees as they try and find reasons for Hawthorn winning that don’t contain the words “better than the other team”.
Hawthorn 11.9.75 def
Sydney 10.10.70

Friday night footy loses a bit of its lustre when it follows Thursday night footy – it loses even more when a game is served up like the one the Dockers and Cats gave us from Perth. PFD once again dominated and will probably win the Brownlow by 700 votes according to most radio commentary I’ve heard this weekend. My own estimate has it closer to 600. He was a cut above the other 43 players involved on Friday night, 31 possessions and 4 goals demonstrating just how good this freak of a man is, while the others just plod around the field hoping for some of the great mans sheen to rub off on them. Speaking of plodders, Michael Barlow’s season is in danger of being over with an AC joint injury and Fremantle’s tanki… um, list management strategy in full swing.
Geelong 11.12.78 def
Fremantle 9.7.61

Saturday afternoon footy returned to the G, as Dustin Martin defeated Essendon by 19 points, the Bombers pretty much blowing their best chance at a win since, well, last week against St Kilda. Poor kicking has been letting the Bombers down over the last two weeks, and a little more accuracy from Daniher, McKernan, Brown, Fantasia would have seen the Bombers convert a few more chances. The Bedraggled Bombers had six more scoring shots, and had more inside 50s than a Richmond team that Damien Harwdick once said was “the best list we’ve had in 5 years” and will go into next weeks McCluggage Cup as favourites against the Lions. I wonder Hugh will win that game. (I’m not even sorry…)
Richmond 16.6.102 def
Essendon 11.17.83

Remember when North Melbourne was 9-0 and top of the ladder? Don’t worry, neither can they. The Kangas have slumped (yes, it’s officially a slump – I checked the rules) to their 6th win from their last 7 matches, and their fifth in a row (their worst losing streak since 2009 by the way), as the Power closed to within two wins of the eighth placed Roos. Now, we here at Holding Steadfast don’t take any pleasure in the demise of the Shinboners, except that we do, and we don’t apologise for it. We told you all not to get excited. We told you this would happen, but oh no – the Arden Street faithful were purchasing grand final tickets and cancelling holidays, and being all too gleeful about it for my liking. The Roos have a six day break, followed by a game against Collingwood in what is sure to be labelled a “danger game” for North Melbourne.
Port Adelaide 16.9.105 def
North Melbourne 10.17.77

There was a game of footy at Cazaly Stadium in Cairns. Someone will have to explain to me the significance of Cazaly to Cairns. Is it just because it’s… up there? (I was going to delete that one because it’s so bad – but nope. You’re getting the lot this week.) Anyway, the Dogs took on the Suns and belted them to the tune of 48 points. No Ablett, Prestia, or Rischitelli – no Suns it seems. Though they did have May, and he ensured that The Man They Call The Package didn’t have a pleasant night, smacking into him from side on and dealing him what looks like a pretty severe AC joint injury. Tom Boyd returned after getting on the sauce and punching on with a team mate to have 5 kicks (he even managed to put one through those tall white sticks) which was enough to have his coach singing his praises after the game. One million dollars per season for 7 seasons. Who is his agent anyway? I need him to look over a contract.
Western Bulldogs 15.17.107 def
Gold Coast 8.11.59

Scott Thompson played his 300th game for Adelaide – and I still wouldn’t know who he is or what he looks like if I bumped into him on the street. Is there a lesser known 300 game player in the competition? I didn’t even realise he started his career at Melbourne until I was researching for this weeks post. (Yes, I research…) Interestingly enough he debuted for Melbourne against St Kilda, and played his 300th game in the week when St Kilda played Melbourne. Amazing right? Alright, so it’s not that big a deal, it’s just that I didn’t see any of this game – and from what I can gather it wasn’t much to write about – except that the Crows won again – making it 8 in a row (I think) and moving them into second on the ladder. I wrote a month ago that I thought they were under the radar. They’re not anymore. The Crows are a legitimate premiership contender – and the competition knows it now.
Adelaide 14.13.97 def
Collingwood 10.9.69

There was a surprising game at the MCG on Sunday afternoon, even if the result wasn’t. The Eagles were in town taking on the Blues, and got the job done in front of under 27,000. Most expected the Eagles to win, and win they did – however they once again showed that their ability to play well on the MCG (and away from home to be honest) is not all it could be cracked up to be. Fun stat – the Eagles average score is 120 when they play at home, and 80 away. Significant – especially given the Grand Final isn’t played at Domain Stadium. I’m going to suggest that the Eagles cruised in this one, they did just enough, and I think they put the cue in the rack early, and then got one hell of a fright from a pumped up Carlton team searching for late season relevance. Oh, Jacob Weitering kicked 2 goals – you’ll probably hear about it, and the US Vice President Joe Biden attended the footy. It’s a shame we had to subject anyone to watching Carlton play – even if he is American.

Melbourne lost to St Kilda at Etihad – Paul Roos blaming the loss on not having Patrick Dangerfield. Maybe he’ll be available for selection next week Paul… Anyhow – Melbourne haven’t beaten the Saints in their last 14 attempts now, and this time around they were comfortably beaten (in the end) by what is becoming a very up and down Saints outfit – who were also without Patrick Dangerfield. Fortunately, the Saints were able to overcome the Dangerfield Deficit to run all over the Demons in the last quarter and pick up the 6 goal victory.
St Kilda 15.20.110 def
Melbourne 11.8.74

And in the final game of the round the Lions got absolutely whacked by GWS. Nothing of note worth writing about in this game, except for the records broken by the Lions.
1) Record losing streak of 12,
2) Record low Gabba crowd of 10,195
PATTONWATCH: 6 marks, 8 kicks, 2 goals. This was probably his best game for the year – which is not a good thing for Big Jon. Leon Cameron would be fuming at the kids trade value dropping by the week.
GWS 22.14.146 def
Brisbane 9.13.67

Next Week:
Pies v Roos, Swans v Blues, Suns v Dockers, Eagles v Demons, Dogs v Saints, Cats v Crows, Bombers v Lions (Hugh McCluggage Cup), Hawks v Tigers, Power v Giants